As most of you know I am married to a sweet man named Chris and we have three boys- Colin, Robson, and Davis. We are very content with our family being the size that it is. Our quiver is full and our wallets are empty! 🙂 So I was feeling good about that and just trying to manage the 3 “little blessings” that God has given to us. But as Davis has passed that 2 year old mark and is very clearly not in the baby stage anymore….and as I realized that we will likely not return to that stage ever again, I was not prepared for the sense of loss that I felt.
There is something so exciting and sweet about being pregnant and having a baby- a new addition to the family! Sweet little movements in your womb when you feel that baby kick and hiccup. Sweet cuddles with a little one that doesn’t talk back or pull away! And this got me to thinking…over the past 10 years since I graduated college, I have had a lot of exciting things happen- big life changes one after another…I have gone overseas twice, gotten engaged and married, had 3 babies, 2 houses and a few job changes sprinkled in there.
So now that those things are in my past and we are sorta “in the trenches” of child rearing and discipline….I found myself asking what exciting thing is next?! Cause this is sorta boring. 🙂 And Jesus reminded me that HE is the excitement and delight that my heart longs for. He is the only real solution to longings and pain and everything that we search after but can’t find.
I thought about the woman at the well of John 4. When she met up with Jesus she had had 5 husbands and the man she was living with now was not even her husband. (John 4:18) I think it’s safe to say that this woman had some unmet emotional longings. She was searching for something that she had not found yet. There was an incompleteness to her soul. Much like you and I have, if we are honest. It looks different for everyone, but we all have them. And if we are searching for things here and now to fill those, we will look and look and look and we might find things or people that temporarily pacify those empty spaces, but none will satisfy like Jesus.
He offered her, and ultimately us as well, living water. He says, ” everyone who drinks this water (temporal) will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him (eternal) will never be thirsty again…” John 4:13-14
I don’t know about you but I want that water. He is telling us that it is possible for a person’s deep longings to be filled by Him when we submit to His lordship and follow Him. I know that he does not promise that we will never feel longings for things here on this earth and I am not saying it’s wrong to have those. But ultimately, He is the only one capable of eternally delighting our souls and placing joy unspeakable in us. I want that!
Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.